11 Ways to Lead with Humility and Pride

No one can out-slay you in your lane when you live in your purpose. When you are in your groove and lane, you might lose people you thought were your friends. You might find that your circle becomes smaller. You might even hear comments like, “Now that you got that big promotion, you are big time now. You don’t have time for the little people.” These types of sentiments can be hurtful. In most cases, your success is a challenge for the individual sharing those comments with you, versus you. 

When you hit your authentic stride, everyone in your life won’t be able to grow and go with you. It’s okay. Many struggle with this concept. Some of your accomplishments will cause others to treat you differently. Everyone won’t be able to handle your bloom but slay anyway! Do not shrink yourself or your achievements for others. You can be simultaneously humble and proud. 

11 TIPS ON SLAYING IN YOUR LANE 

1. Stop competing with others.
   Instead, compete with yourself. You are in a one-person race. Your success is not dependent on beating out the next person. It is dependent on you finishing your journey. It’s enhanced by you running in your stride, your tempo, and your pace. So many people get distracted by what’s happening in the next person’s lane. You were okay with your race (your job) until you saw how someone else was running. You envy their promotion, their accolades, and their accomplishments.If you genuinely want to slay in your lane, you should learn to compete with yourself and stop caring about the achievement of others. You cannot beat anyone else at their race. Envying others will cause you to lose your race and miss out on your goals and aspirations. It will cause you to stumble and lose focus on your dreams. You were okay with your job and the amount you were being paid until you saw your peer get promoted or learned they made more than you—set goals based on your dreams, not others.
2. Put an end to comparing yourself to others.
   Do you compare your success to those you follow on social media? Or do you compare yourself with your girlfriends, coworkers, siblings, or college peers? Making parallels is natural, according to the social comparison hypothesis. However, it’s unrealistic and unhealthy to judge your life based on others. It forces you to lose focus on your authentic nature. You lose sight of your lane and your aspirations. Please know that when you compare yourself to others, you are making a comparison from a minimal view. Social media shows you the best and most inflated versions of a person’s life.There are filters and backgrounds that can alter the look, background, and even the setting. You only see the 20%. You have no idea of the “real” person or the struggles they’ve gone through to reach their success. You don’t know their story! Stay focused onyour lane. No one can outrun or slay you in your lane. Keep a gratitude notebook to help you remember the blessings in your life and as a reminder that your lane was made just for you. 
3. Be resilient.
   Each journey begins with the first step. You personify strength and courage when you live authentically. You must learn to persevere and keep yourself motivated. Always start with a plan and follow it all the way. Don’t give up. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and similarly your lofty goals won’t be realized overnight. You may think your dreams are hopeless at times. Do not give up in the middle of your journey. Stay the course.There’s a strong probability that success could be right around the corner when you’re about to give up. Always remember to set realistic goals and follow through on them. No matter how challenging your journey may be, always be willing to stick with it. No matter how often you have been turned down for a job, don’t give up. Also, remember to ensure that your expectations are realistic, and your goals are attainable.
4. Face your fears.
   Stop waiting to apply for a promotion until you are more self-assured. Stop turning down opportunities to return to school or learn a new skill. Stop delaying your goals. Start by confronting your anxieties. Everyone occasionally struggles with fear. Some concerns may even serve a purpose by inspiring you to strive harder or push your boundaries. However, if your fears hinder you from taking the necessary steps to ensure your happiness and well-being, it’s time to break free.Fearing a little is expected. In actuality, fear aids in your natural defense mechanisms. In the short term, avoiding the circumstances you fear could help you feel better, but avoidance will lead to a life of regret. Practice tackling some of your fears that are brought on by inexperience or uncomfortability. If your dream does not scare you, then it’s probably not a dream. Fear keeps you humble because you recognize your humanity. Let your fear propel you forward versus keeping you stuck.
5. Surround yourself with positive people.
   Everybody makes mistakes. Learn from your past mistakes and do better. Do not dwell on them. Also, do not surround yourself with people that use every opportunity to remind you of your mistakes. Whatever your identity, the people you associate with reveal a lot about you. You can be lifted or brought down by the friends you choose. Select friends who are upbeat, ambitious, and encouraging. These are the individuals who will aid in your success. Have supportive friends and be a supportive friend also. 
6. Stay passionate. One of the best ways to stay motivated is to be passionate about your work. As a result, if you are passionate about what you do, you are more likely to succeed because you will be able to maintain your motivation. You will have an optimistic outlook when you are passionate about your work. You’ll practice more. You’ll strive to perform better. You won’t give up, and your resolve will be greater.
   Most importantly, you will adopt an optimistic outlook and develop the conviction that, with effort, everything will work out for the best. This is how extraordinary individuals succeed. They are disciplined and enthusiastic about what they do. And this is the reason they are prosperous.
7. Learn how to say no.
   While doing what you’re skilled in can enhance your self-assurance, it’s equally crucial to be aware of circumstances that might make you lose confidence. Perhaps you discover that you feel worse when you engage in a particular activity rather than feeling better about yourself. It’s acceptable to decline engagements that undermine your mental well-being. You shouldn’t ignore anything that makes you uncomfortable because discomfort is frequently a necessary component of personal development. However, there is nothing wrong with setting boundaries and observing them. Setting limits in social and emotional areas makes you feel psychologically safe.
   Additionally, it could make you feel more in control. Feeling in charge of your life is a crucial component of self-worth—boundaries aid in creating a sense of control. Learn the art of saying no. No is a complete sentence when you learn how to slay in your own lane.
8. Stay humble.
   Be honorable in your actions. Success does not come easily. It requires hard work. Be considerate and sympathetic to others as you climb the corporate ladder. You never know when you’ll need their assistance. Leadership is when people choose to follow you in the absence of power and authority because they believe in you and the vision you are leading. Be a person that people want to follow and intentionally choose. Your humanity is an expression and testament in how you treat people. Always stay humble and remember your journey. 
9. It’s acceptable to fail.
   When it comes to learning how to slay in your lane, this is your most crucial lesson. The number of times you fail in life doesn’t matter. How frequently you get up after failing serves as the yardstick. Keep in mind that failures are learning opportunities. Get back up and prepare for another journey without making the same mistakes again. Failure merely indicates that you were a little bit closer to perfection than you had been before. 
10. Abandon self-sabotage (Negative Self-Talk).
    Given that your authentic rhythm has been awakened, you may think or feel doubts about your life more often than in the past. This is the time to practice thinking positive thoughts instead of negative ones. What you say to yourself daily and what you believe about yourself are examples of self-talk. When we talk negatively to ourselves, we may say things like, “This isn’t right for someone like me,” or “I don’t deserve this,” or “I can’t do this.” We are more inclined to act in ways that promote poor self-perceptions when experiencing unpleasant thoughts or sensations about ourselves. Start praising yourself for your abilities, successes, and accomplishments, no matter how big or small. Listen to upbeat music to shift your mindset and create positive vibes!
11. Use constructive self-talk.
    By persuading your subconscious that you can’t handle something or that it is too hard, and you shouldn’t even try, negative self-talk can restrict your abilities and lower your self-confidence. On the other hand, positive self-talk can encourage self-compassion, assist in overcoming self-doubt, and encourage you to take on new challenges.Remember that your views aren’t always accurate. The next time you feel like you have no business speaking up in a meeting or that your opinions are irrelevant, stop the music. Change the song and beat. Then figure out a strategy to transform those thoughts into more encouraging self-talk and use your voice.

Written by Joy Fitzgerald.
Have you read?
How raising your emotional intelligence can make you the best salesperson in the room by Christopher Golis.
The Great Resignation is Over – Or Is It by Walt Brown.
How to (Really) Build Cross-Cultural Competence from Education Abroad Experiences by Dr. Paula Caligiuri.
To Achieve Top Performance, Growth Mindset is Not Enough by Brent Keltner.
Book Review: Confessions of an Economic Hit Man 3rd Edition – China’s EHM Strategy; Ways to Stop the Global Takeover, by John Perkins by Ladys Patino.