Leadership Excellence: Practical Approaches to Managing Perfectionism

“Perfection is not attainable, but if we chase perfection, we can catch excellence.” —Vince Lombardi

Merriam-Webster defines perfection as “the quality or state of being perfect, such as freedom from fault or defect,” or “an unsurpassable degree of accuracy or excellence.” Google’s English dictionary, provided by Oxford Languages, defines it as “the condition, state, or quality of being free or as free as possible from all flaws or defects.”

Note the difference. As Lombardi said, perfection is not attainable. However, one can strive for excellence, making oneself better in the process.

Numerous studies on perfectionism in psychology have illustrated the positives and negatives of the urge to be a perfectionist. The authors of the 2018 Harvard Business Review article “The Pros and Cons of Perfectionism, According to Research” conducted a meta-analysis of 95 studies involving 25,000 adults and came to this conclusion:

“Our results affirm that perfectionism meaningfully and consistently predicts several “beneficial” workplace outcomes. For example, perfectionists are more motivated on the job, work longer hours, and can be more engaged at work. However, our results also indicate that perfectionism is strongly and consistently related to numerous “detrimental” work and non-work outcomes, including higher levels of burnout, stress, workaholism, anxiety, and depression.”

They also found perfectionism in an individual does not translate to better performance.

Leaders and perfectionism 

When leaders are perfectionists, this impacts their personal lives and the lives of their team members.

In their 1991 paper, “Perfectionism in the Self and Social Contexts: Conceptualization, Assessment, and Association with Psychopathology,” Paul Hewitt and Gordon Flett describe three perfectionism components:

1. Self-oriented: Holding oneself to the highest standards, relentlessly pursuing them, and self-correcting when falling short of the internal benchmark.
2. Socially Prescribed: The feeling that the environment or close connections place a great demand on oneself.
3. Other-Oriented: Expecting those around one to be held to the highest standards, and when the demand is not met, resorting to blaming, grudges, and diminished trust

At the personal level, both self-oriented and socially prescribed components can affect a leader and shape their behaviors.

The relentless pursuit of perfectionism can lead to burnout. Elon Musk’s self-oriented perfectionism manifests in the highly ambitious goals he sets for himself, trying to make each one more audacious than the previous. It is well-known that he works extraordinarily long hours and has acknowledged that this is detrimental to his health. At the same time, that internal drive has resulted in numerous innovations. The socially prescribed component is evident in the expectations that the media, his followers, and the stakeholders continue to express.

At the team level, the other-oriented component of perfectionism can cause team members to strive to meet their leader’s expectations, leading to burnout and mental health problems, resulting in a transfer to another team or, worst-case, their departure from the company.

Strategies for Leaders to Tame the Beast of Perfectionism  

1. Become Self-Aware
   “When I discover who I am, I’ll be free.”  —Ralph Ellison, Invisible Man
   When you have self-awareness, you understand your strengths and weaknesses. You are realistic about your capabilities, areas where you shine, and areas where you need improvement. Instead of worrying about perfection, you can work towards getting better in those. The relentless pressure to be perfect is reduced. Self-awareness also helps you come across in your relationships as sincere and authentic.

   There are two types of self-awareness. Internal and external. There are many behavioral assessments that you can take to understand what makes you tick. External understanding comes from 360-degree assessments, which invite input from your superiors, peers, reports, and yourself. One such evaluation was instrumental in my success as a leader.

2. Develop Humility
   “And to see you’re really only very small and life flows on within you and without you.” —George Harrison
   Self-awareness helps us to accept we are not perfect. Humility allows us to use that knowledge to enrich our lives. As I wrote in Navigating the Long and Winding Road: Inspiring Leadership Insights from Paul McCartney’s Life, “In today’s complex world, none of us have all the answers. Great leaders of today value collaboration to solve thorny problems. They are humble and don’t hesitate to accept that they don’t have all the answers and ask for help. They bring optimism and enthusiasm to their teams and model the behavior they expect. They empower their teams to get things done.”
3. Use Your Vulnerability
   “The perfect human being is all human beings put together, it is a collective, it is all of us together that make perfection.” —Socrates
   When you acknowledge that there are things where you shine and some areas where you could use some help and ask for it, success results. Being vulnerable is hard for leaders because they feel they must have all the answers—the socially prescribed component in Paul Hewitt and Gordon Flett’s insightful paper on perfectionism. Socrates’s saying from thousands of years ago resonates true and strong today. Together, we can be perfect.

   When you hire someone for your team, look for capabilities to help fill the gaps created by your imperfections. By empowering them and collaborating, you can achieve your goals and, even more importantly, learn from them.

4. Learn from Mistakes: Growth mindset
   “I don’t mind losing as long as I see improvement or I feel I’ve done as well as I possibly could.”  —Carol Dweck
   Learning from your imperfections is crucial to growth. With a fixed mindset, one believes they know all there is to know. With a growth mindset, one believes there is always room for improvement. They view each mistake and failure as an opportunity to learn and improve themselves.

   During my career, in my 360-degree assessment, my colleagues informed me that I am often impatient and have too high expectations for myself and others. Knowing and accepting this enabled me to change my behavior and become a better leader.

   Developing a growth mindset requires you to be a lifelong learner who doesn’t shrink away from failures. Use your curiosity to keep your inner light burning and fueling your desire to keep growing.

Strive for Excellence 

Instead of chasing perfection, learn from your imperfections, stretch yourself by becoming self-aware, and use your humility, vulnerability, and growth mindset to help you lead. The rewards include better mental health, enduring relationships, and success in any endeavor you pursue.

Written by Shantha Mohan Ph.D.

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