Big Picture

Rogue Relatives And Toxic Siblings: Maintain A Dignified Silence

“I rose from humble origins with toxic family background. When I was 18 years old, I dropped out of college to support my parents financially and joined the Indian Air Force. I had to struggle hard to earn my livelihood. I sacrificed my personal time, invested a portion of my monthly salary and resources, and acquired several qualifications including DME, BSc, MA, MBA, PGDCLL, and PGDBM. I earned my Ph.D. in 2011. I understand the pain of life. I am a self-made man. I have come to know that there’s no such thing as a free lunch.” ―Professor M.S. Rao

I was born into a toxic family and grew up in a toxic environment. My childhood was like a hell. I enjoyed reading books. I did not have many friends. I supported my father in a tea stall. I was not getting the right ambiance to pursue my education. I dropped out of my college to support my parents financially and joined the Indian Air Force as a soldier. The military life was tough and challenging but I found it far better than my toxic family. I enjoyed interacting with positive people in the Indian Air Force. I became organized and grew as a disciplined citizen and leader.

How To Come Out Of Your Toxic Family Background?

“You can only be jealous of someone who has something you think you ought to have yourself.” ―Margaret Atwood

Explore options to come out of your toxic family background. Connect with healthy and positive people. Forgive your toxic family and siblings. Support them as much as you can because you were born into it. Forget the bad memories. Engage with creative people. Invest in healthy relationships. Inspire people around you. You cannot choose your parents and children. You can only choose your spouse and career. You can choose your friends wisely who can support you. So, don’t regret being born into a toxic family. Don’t carry emotional baggage. Forgive them and forget negative people. Spend your time with the people who support you. Don’t feel guilty that you were born to toxic parents. It is better to separate with a smile than to live with toxic family members and suffer silently.

Do Relatives Have More Jealousy Than Friends?

“Jealousy in romance is like salt in food. A little can enhance the savor, but too much can spoil the pleasure and, under certain circumstances, can be life-threatening.” ―Maya Angelou

I have come across jealously in some people especially in my relatives. Why do people have jealousy? When people cannot achieve what you achieved in your life they have jealousy. People with low self-esteem and insecurity have jealousy and envy. They often compare with successful people. They know that they cannot become successful like you.

Jealousy and envy is the root of many challenges in relationships and society. Some people observe jealousy among their friends while some observe among their relatives. Jealousy is more especially in relatives because they cannot digest when you are respected within your community for your achievements. Therefore, they badmouth and talk ill of you but it boomerangs them ultimately. So, don’t take them seriously. Ignore them. Stay away from them. Don’t take the bait. Set boundaries. Speak up. Say goodbye. Forgive and forget them. Trust yourself. Surround with positive people. Engage your mind constructively and creatively. Keep doing your work sincerely and seriously to add value to others. Focus on the brightness of your own light. Be happy with your success.

Maintain A Dignified Silence

“See the light in you. Your life is in your hands. Enjoy every moment by looking at the positive aspects. Build a new foundation with the bricks thrown at you. Turn your scars into stars. Life is great.” ―Professor M.S. Rao

Maintain a dignified silence with your toxic family members and rogue relatives. Slap them with your success. Remember, lotus blooms from the mud. Some of the greatest people were born with toxic family backgrounds and inspired the world. They chose to be different and became trailblazers. Stay inspired.

“Jealousy is the tribute mediocrity pays to genius.” ―Fulton J. Sheen

Written by Professor M.S. Rao, Ph.D.

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Professor M.S. Rao, Ph.D.
Professor M.S. Rao, Ph.D. is the Father of “Soft Leadership” and the Founder of MSR Leadership Consultants, India. He is an International Leadership Guru with forty years of experience and the author of fifty books including the award-winning See the Light in You: Acquire Spiritual Powers to Achieve Mindfulness, Wellness, Happiness, and Success (Waterside Productions; January 16, 2020). He is a C-Suite advisor and global keynote speaker. He brings a strategic eye and long-range vision given his multifaceted professional experience including military, teaching, training, research, consultancy, and philosophy. He is passionate about serving and making a difference in the lives of others. He trains a new generation of leaders through leadership education and publications. His vision is to build one million students as global leaders by 2030. He has the vision to share his knowledge freely with one billion people globally. He advocates gender equality globally (#HeForShe). He was ranked #1 Thought Leader and Influencer in HR globally by Thinkers360. He invests his time in authoring books and blogging on executive education, learning, and leadership. Most of his work is available free of charge on his four blogs including Vision 2030: One Million Global Leaders. He is a prolific author and a dynamic, energetic, and inspirational leadership speaker. Professor M.S. Rao, Ph.D. is an opinion columnist for the CEOWORLD magazine. Follow him on Twitter or connect on LinkedIn.